So…What is it that you do?

So…What is it that you do?  Post-college in D.C had to be some of the most rewarding yet intense years of my life.   The dreadful small talk at social/networking events was enough to make me have an eat, pray, love year!

What do you do? Registered in my mind as:  What’s your title? Why are you important? Who are you? Do you really matter?

Often times in our western society we place value on how people classify themselves based on employment.   “Oh, I have a law degree. I’m a doctor. I teach in the inner city. I’m a staffer for a notable congressman. I’m studying to get my Ph.D.”  Which all translates to ” Hello, I matter!  I have spent hella money on a piece of paper to be important to somebody!”

Now, by no means am I discrediting my educated peers, I myself have a degree and have fully exploited the privileges I paid for!  But what happens when that degree doesn’t land you the job of your dreams? When your executive title has been snatched away from you at your corporate job. When you can’t answer with confidence and pride the question, So what do you do?

Who are you beyond that job?  This is where it gets tricky.  For many of us, we live for the moment after graduation and the 3-4 year struggle post undergrad and graduate school to say exactly what it is we “DO”.

You know the one, it’s “That job”. The one that felt right during the interview.  The one that matched your skill set perfectly. The one you felt you could grow with.  The one your parents were proud of. The one that offered that salary increase you dreamed of. When you lose it, what is next? What do we do when we loose the job that offered such security before?


Here is a Quick tip for letting go of “that job”: Practice gratitude

In the midst of a reclined job offer or dismissal from a company, nothing soothes the pain better than a dose of gratitude. Reflect on what you learned while working with this company.  Determine your new set of demands for the next place of employment.  Determine if working for someone else is what you truly desire. Identify the skills you brought to the table and ones that you picked up along the way.  Be thankful for the opportunity to have that experience and a job that carried you thus far.  Re-focus your energy in a positive direction through gratitude as you set out on your next employment adventure!

For more information on “The Art of Letting Go” check out my new e-course:




Letting go: Matters of the heart    E-Course: The Art of Letting Go

We grow the most in relationships.  Well let me clarify, I personally have learned the most from my relationships.  In these spaces, I am forced to be vulnerable.  In these spaces, I am forced to see the fullness of who I am.  It is in these spaces that we as people see the manifestations of our deeply rooted beliefs about life, who we are, and how we show up in the world.  Plain and simple relationships are our truth juice.   So when a union ends, no matter the time frame, it hurts.  It causes you to question who you are, what you are, what you bring to the table, what you will and will not accept in your space, why you accepted what you did, and a series of other questions that often times lead you down a path of overthinking and pain. It is in these moments, the quiet space of our mind, where truth becomes the master.  Even the most confident person, in these moments of truth, ask why and how.

No person dreams of the end when they connect with someone but it is one of those inevitable truths.  If you are anything like me you quietly process and resolve or stuff your feelings and emotions in places to never be seen or heard of again…well until they are seen and heard again.  Generally in the next relationship or moment of disappointment.

I’ve learned what you don’t address will manifest. For me, it has been critical to consciously release those thoughts, feelings, and emotions one step at a time.


So here is a  MATTERS OF THE HEART QUICK TIP:  Tell yourself the TRUTH

Determine for yourself what is it that the relationship gave you or provided you with.  In what ways did that relationship cripple you from providing that for yourself? Ask yourself do I miss the person or the idea of that person and the benefits of the relationship? Ask yourself, what was the reality of the relationship?

This is your starting place to release, heal, and thrive!


For more info on how to release matters of the heart visit and enroll in the e-course “The Art of Letting Go”.


#getfree #release #letgotogrow